We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
