dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
