haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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