Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
