Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
So many bounce houses so little time
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
