i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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