$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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