Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Dear god my vagina.
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