Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
MIDGETS
????
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
