So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Randomize
