sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
