im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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