I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
