I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
