why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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