Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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