He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
