Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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