did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Randomize
