There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
