I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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