is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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