My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
