Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
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