You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
