Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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