I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
