I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
