sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
