Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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