so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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