I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize
