WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
