Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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