U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize