Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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