Just fell off a train. Bad.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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