Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
well most of my day revolves around power hour
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
