Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
