dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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