thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize