The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
