ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
