So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
