i love accidental penises.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
