I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
