She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
