the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
