you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
