using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
